1.12.13

-Love EVERY Body - 1er mes-


¡Buenas buenas! Raro tenerme por acá un domingo, ¿no? Y sí, confieso que los domingos prefiero dormir hasta tarde y no tener que pensar en nada, pero hoy vamos a hacer una excepción.

Leah, del blog Just me, Leah propuso hacer un workshop llamado Love Every Body. Su idea es tratar de ver lo positivo en nuestro cuerpo, no sólo en la parte física de por sí sino por todas las cosas que éste hace por nosotras. La estrategia que armó es tomar por separado cada parte del cuerpo, para de esta forma cambiar de a poco algunas de las ideas negativas que fuimos acumulando a lo largo de los años. Todas las participantes vamos a estar publicando nuestros artículos el primer domingo de cada mes hasta llegar al final del workshop. (Así que sí, aunque sea un domingo por mes voy a estar levantándome temprano. Leah tiene suerte de que me caiga tan bien, je).

Nuestra primera asignación es escribir una carta a nuestro cuerpo, reconociendo las cosas que hemos pasado juntos. Todavía no empecé y ya me da miedito lo que pueda salir, pero bueno, acá vamos:


Querido cuerpo:

Trato de pensar las cosas que pasamos juntos y creo que hay algo por lo que tengo que disculparme primero que todo: el estado de nuestra piel. Perdoname por no buscar antes un médico competente que pudiera entender lo que nos estaba pasando y que nos ayudara a resolverlo. Rasqué nuestra piel hasta sacar sangre, no dejé curar las lastimaduras que se nos formaban y nos llené de cicatrices por eso. Perdoname por culparte por no poder parar ese ciclo, y sobre todo por todavía hoy enojarme por cómo luce. Sé que muchas veces veo fotos de otras mujeres y lo primero que me pasa por la cabeza es “su piel es tan hermosa, no como la mía”. Y no es justo. Tenemos una enfermedad y tratamos de manejarlo de la mejor manera que pudimos, y seguimos haciéndolo ahora con más conocimiento de lo que pasa, pero eso no puede deshacer lo que vivimos ni las cicatrices (físicas y mentales) que esto dejó atrás. Estuve tan orgullosa de vos cuando fuimos a tatuarnos, porque no sangraste y curaste rápido. ¿Porqué no me di cuenta antes de que gracias a esas características nuestra piel luce mucho mejor de lo que podría ser? Perdoname por no haberlo pensado antes.

La verdad que siempre fuiste muy bueno conmigo, y muy pocas veces lo veo de esa manera. Es cierto que elegiste tener el color de pelo, piel y ojos oscuro de papá en vez del pelo rubio, la piel blanca y los ojos verdes de mamá, pero bueno, supongo que después de 30 años así tendría que dejarlo ir y tratar de hacer lo mejor posible con lo que me diste. Y también es cierto que de un día para otro decidiste que la copa de mi corpiño debería ser 105 y por eso las chicas se fueron al suelo más rápido de lo que pude notar, y eso sí que lo encuentro difícil de perdonar. Pero más allá de eso, no me diste muchos conflictos con los que lidiar. El asma de la infancia quedó en esa época, salvo algunas pocas excepciones. El quiste sebáceo en mi cabeza no era maligno, y te bancaste que la cirujana lo sacara sin ningún problema.   

Aparte de la piel, supongo que nuestro mayor conflicto fue la gordura. Te acusé de estar enfermo, de rebelarte contra mí, de mantenerme prisionera donde no quería estar. Ahora entiendo que no tenés ninguna enfermedad y que solamente sos como nuestros genes designaron que seas. Sé que a veces todavía te maldigo por darme una doble papada, una panza con forma rara y muslos que parecen expandirse más cada vez que miro para abajo. Prometo seguir trabajando para evitarlo, y tratar de ver la belleza que hay en todas tus partes.

¿Recordás esa noche que nos sacamos fotos y sentí tanto amor por vos que tuve que rodearte con los brazos lo más que pude para mostrártelo? Prometo hacer lo posible para tener más noches y días como esos, y menos en los que te vea como un extraño.

Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gisela.


Cuéntenme, ¿qué les parece este workshop que empezamos hoy? ¿Qué pondrían ustedes si le escribieran una carta a su propio cuerpo?

Si tienen un ratito, dénse una vuelta por lo de Leah a ver los artículos de las otras increíbles bloggers que también están participando.


*Como la mayoría de las participantes de este workshop son de habla inglesa, voy a publicar los artículos de esta serie en los dos idiomas, para que no haya ninguna barrera de entendimiento.




Hello hello! It´s weird having me here on a Sunday, right? Yes, I confess that on Sundays I rather sleep in and not having to think about anything, but today we´re gonna make an exception.

Leah, from Just me, Leah, came up with a workshop called Love Every Body. Her idea is to try to see the positive in our bodies, not just regarding our exterior but for everything they do for us. The strategy she put together is to take each part of our body separately, in order to change some of the negative ideas we´ve been accumulating through the years. All the participants will be posting our assignments the first Sunday of every month till the end of the workshop. (So yes, I´ll be waking up early at least one Sunday per month. Leah is lucky I like her so much, hahaha)

Our first assignment is to write a letter to our body, acknowledging the things we´ve been through together. I haven´t even started yet and I´m already a little afraid of what might come up, but here we go:


Dear body,

I try to think about the things we´ve been through together and I believe there´s something for which I must apologize first of all: the condition of our skin. Forgive me for not seeking earlier a competent doctor who could understand what was going on with us and help us solve it. I scratched our skin till it bled, didn´t let the injuries heal and now we´re covered in scars because of that. I´m sorry for blaming you for not being able to stop that cycle, and specially for still being angry because of the way it looks. I know that many times I look at other women´ photos and the first thing that comes to my mind is “her skin is so beautiful, unlike mine”. And it´s not fair. We have a condition and we tried to handle it the best way we could, and we still do –now with more knowledge of what´s going on. But it doesn´t undo what we lived or the (physical and mental) scars it left behind. I was so proud of you when we got our tattoos, for not bleeding and healing so fast. Why didn´t I notice before that thanks to those traits our skin looks so much better that what it could look? Forgive me for not noticing that earlier.      

The truth is, you´ve always been very good to me, and I don´t see it that way very often. It´s true that you chose to have dad´s dark hair, skin and eye color instead of mom´s blonde hair, white skin and green eyes, but well, I guess that after 30 years like this I should let it go and try to do the best I can with what you gave me. And it is also true that you decided overnight that my bra size should be 36DD and so ´the girls´ went south as soon as they appeared, and that is something I do find hard to forgive. But beyond that, you didn´t give me too much issues to deal with. My childhood asthma ended then, except for a very few times. The sebaceous cyst in my head wasn´t malignant, and you let the surgeon take it out with no issues at all.

Besides from our skin, I guess our biggest conflict was our fatness. I accused you of being ill, of rebel against me, of keeping me locked where I didn´t wanna be. Now I understand that you don´t have a disease and that you are just the way our genes decided you should be. I know that sometimes I still curse you for giving me a double chin, a weird shaped belly and tights that seem to expand farther every time I look down. I promise I´ll keep working on avoiding that, and to try to see the beauty on every one of your parts.
Do you remember the night we took photos of ourself and I felt so much love for you that I had to wrap my arms around you as much as I could to show you? I promise I´ll do my best to have more nights and days like that, and less in which I see you as a stranger.

Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gisela.


Tell me, what do you think of this workshop we´re starting today? What would you write on a letter to your own bodies?


If you have a few minutes, check out Leah´s blog to see the other amazing bloggers´ posts.


Besos,

-Gi-

13 comentarios:

  1. Hello. I found your blog as I'm taking part in the workshop too.

    I know how hard it is having a skin condition and how much it can affect your confidence.

    Big hugs and much love. I hope you gain all from the workshop that you want to and much more.

    I look forward to reading the rest of your posts.

    Roxilicious82 @ Simply Roxilicious!

    ResponderBorrar
    Respuestas
    1. Thank you so much Roxi!
      I look forward to reading your posts too.

      Borrar
  2. I've never noticed your skin Gi! I just see the dazzling smile in your photos and think how lovely you look. I'm glad you can see the good your body does and I hope by the end of the challenge you feel a little better about your appearance. Thanks for getting up early for us! x x x

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    Respuestas
    1. Thank you Leah! Sometimes my skin is the only thing I see when I look on the mirror, and that´s something I need to work on.
      It was a great idea to start this workshop, and I´m glad I had the chance to be a part of it.

      Borrar
  3. I love the part when you said you hugged your body. Thats amazing. And I'm glad to read about the cyst being removed safely. Your body's strong!

    ResponderBorrar
    Respuestas
    1. Yes it is, and it´s good to take a moment and consider what I always take for granted.
      Loved reading your post too!

      Borrar
  4. Hi. Another blog participant here. You commented on my blog, which was lovely, thankyou.

    I understand the skin thing and the scratching until you bleed. I completely forgot to put that in my blog. I have psoriasis of the scalp and little patches on my face and legs and gooooood they itch when it's playing up.

    When I look at your photo, I see beautiful honey skin and a lovely smile. Also I have to comment on your obvious intelligence as I can see you are Spanish - the sexiest language and accent in the world in my opinion! (I did it to GCSE level in school) Your English is faultless. I wish my grasp of languages (which I LOVE) were as wonderful.

    I look forward to following your journey.

    I LOVED your comment about taking photos and loving your body. I aspire that that :) xxx

    ResponderBorrar
    Respuestas
    1. Hi Lisa. I hear psoriasis can be hell. I have atopic dermatitis, which is a condition that makes the skin on my whole body completely dry and itchi all the time. I´m getting treatment now, but it can still get me to hurt myself from time to time.
      Thank you so much for your compliments. I´m actually from Argentina, but I´ve always loved learning other languages and became an English teacher over ten years ago.
      I hope that you get to the point where you can have a night as the one I mention, I can honestly say it was one of the best of my life.

      X X X

      Borrar
  5. Hi Gisela. I really love the photo you've included in this post, it's beautiful and you are beautiful too :) your skin looks fantastic to me and a beautiful tone. I can relate to the issues surrounding skin conditions though and that sometimes we percieve things differently to others; luckily (I suppose) my acne was/is limited to my face but it does leave a lot of scarring. I try to think of it like I think of my other scars, as 'war wounds' that I've accumulated over time and have been strong enough to survive :) looking forward to reading your future posts x

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    Respuestas
    1. Hi Betty. Thank you for your kind words.
      I know what you mean about considering scars as ´war wounds´ and I try to do so, but it´s hard. I guess that´s one of the things I need to keep working on.
      X X X

      Borrar
  6. I completely understand how your skin can cause so much insecurity. I have Rosacea and can often look completely red. But I think the scars that are left behind give you a story. They have helped create the person that you are and should be celebrate instead of agonized over. :) You are beautiful. And our scars are just reminder of our strength and of all the things we have overcome.

    I look forward to completing this workshop with you! Y me encanta que lo estas completando en inglés y español!

    ResponderBorrar
    Respuestas
    1. Thank you so much Lynsey. I struggle to see it that way, but will keep working on it.

      I loved your blog, btw! I´m glad this workshop is already getting us in touch. Y es muy bueno tener a algunas más que entiendan español!!

      Borrar
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